And I don't feel fine. Not at all. (Yes, that is a reference to an R.E.M. song)

I'm in a serious down swing of hate lately. I am not usually one for saying I hate things and/or people. But lately I have been feeling very hate-filled. I hate this deployment. I hate the Army right now as well. I don't hate my children, but they are seriously ticking me off. My neighbor is also on the shit list at the moment, and though my husband insists I should just speak to her, I am afraid if I do I will end up reverting to my old self and punch her in the teeth. Yes, there was a point that THAT was more likely the kind of response you would get from me. I thought I had left that behind, and it seems to be creeping back in slowly. Worrisome, yes.

I used to be pretty nice, have somewhat pleasent things to say, and lately I hear myself talk and everything sounds so negative. I'm not sure if it is the end of the deployment talking, or if I have lost it and have no more patience.

Oh yes, by the way, I'm an Army Wife, mother of three boys (NOW you know why I am nuts), and a jack of all trades, Master of none.